Now
that we have arrived at the half-way point of the summer vacation
period, this may be just the time to do something you quite possibly
have been putting off for a long time. Can you think of someone who has
done something for you, either recently or over a long period of time,
that you haven’t really and truly thanked? What about the person who
helped you push your car out of the ditch? What about the person who
coached your child this summer or last winter? What about the grocery
store clerk who always has time to give you a smile? What about the
receptionist who always manages to squeeze in your appointment at the
last minute?
We live in such a fast-paced world that special moments often speed
by without giving us time to express our real gratitude and appreciation
to caring people who have touched our life. The moment passes and we
move on to the next thing right away. The act of kindness meant a lot to
us at the time, but as time moves on it seems less and less significant,
especially to the person who showed us the kindness.
How wrong we are! Just think of the last time that someone thanked
you for doing them a small favour. Think about how it made you feel to
have someone send you a little note, or phone you, or email you, or give
you a special hug and a smile to show their appreciation. Think about
how it made you feel when this expression of gratitude came some time
after the event. It often means a lot more to receive a thank you after
the fact because it shows that the person still thinks about what you
did even after the passing of time. Now that you know how good it made
you feel to receive a belated "thank you", remember that
everyone else feels the same way.
This fact was driven home to me recently when I came across the
following story:
A man by the name of William Stidger taught at Boston University. He
once reflected upon the great number of un-thanked people in his life.
These were people who had helped nurture him, inspire him or who cared
enough about him to leave a lasting impression. Once of these people was
a school teacher he’d not heard of in many years. But he remembered
that she had gone out of her way to put a love of verse in him, and Will
had loved poetry all his life. He wrote a letter of thanks to her. The
reply he received, written in the feeble scrawl of the aged, began
"My Dear Willie:" He was delighted. Now over 50, bald and a
professor, he didn’t think there was a person left in the world who
would call him "Willie". Here is that letter:
"My Dear Willie,
I cannot tell you how much your note meant to me. I am in my
eighties, living alone in a small room, cooking my own meals, lonely,
and, like the rest of autumn, lingering behind. You will be interested
to know that I taught school for 50 years and yours is the first note of
appreciation I ever received. It came on a blue-cold morning and it
cheered me as nothing has in many years."
Not prone to cry easily, William Stidger wept over that note. She was
one of the great un-thanked people from Will’s past.
We all have people like Will’s school teacher in our life. The
teacher who made a difference. The coach we will never forget. The nurse
who cared for us after the accident. The best friend we haven’t seen
for years. We all remember people who shaped our lives in various ways -
some small and some big - but each had an impact on who we are today.
After Will Stidger received the reply from his school teacher, he
realized that he could no longer leave people un-thanked. He also
realized that by thanking these people and showing them that he really
did care about what they had done, he in turn may be doing something
very significant for them.
So as you are sitting around relaxing for the rest of the summer,
spend some time thinking about some of the un-thanked people from your
past. It may not be too late to say thank you. You have no idea how much
your words will mean.
Have a good week!
